Tired. Just tired.

You know those moments when you happen to catch yourself in the corner of your eye and realize, "whoa. what just happened?" Well this has been my world for a little bit now. A long bit. I've had a few in my life. Just last week I had one. I was going through the motions of something then, I found myself standing, completely clueless, wondering "what now?" Typically I have answers or a solution for just about everything, it's just how my brain works. It constantly works on solutions and "outs". Last week though, I felt my skin struggling to understand the abruptness in the space time continuum. It took a few days to recover (that's code for catch up on sleep) but coming out on the other end I realize that I find myself feeling saddened, almost like a balloon which has been deflated and is whizzing around the room with no real direction but is powered and is moving along just fine. I'm sure some would read this and wonder if there will be a turn around or something. I'd respond with I can always inflate this again, but I don't feel as if it be appreciated as of yet, so I'll manage until I feel that I can..........

Retrospective Delayed.

Words are often meant to be the path to clarity and comprehension.

Thoughts and sentiments are the vehicles of expression.

What's mostly interrupts this - - - doubt.

Higher reasoning mammals given the ability to decide the "why's" and "how's" of situations often brings us to the precipice of doubt and second guessing. This is more than just instinctual decisiveness where most would say "I felt like I should go left instead of right" as opposed to reasoning their way through the numerous outcomes of where their decisions would bring them.

I speak of that sliver of space between the aforementioned where the slight hesitation, if magnified, could reveal more of the human psyche than a mere dice roll or palm reading.

For most, the act of thinking and processing of a decision or a reflection of decisions, is much more than consequential thinking. This is more directed toward affected thinking or vibrative emotion to a given idea, thought or situation. Simply, if a decision, not based or preceded by emotion is made - this is a solid and whole decision. However, if this has been given a moment of chance in thought, then doubt expands in the space given and creates permanency, solidifies, roots and remains. Combating the opportunity is to allow the free will and spirit of thought, to be strong and true to what it feels and not weaken when given an unclear path.


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This philosophical moment was brought to you by my philosophy class, the letter M and pink lemonade.